I was happily blogging (!) the other day when the telephone rang. I answered it and realised straight away the person on the other end was going to try to sell me something!"Can I speak to Mrs. Subsiding?" Said the voice
"Suburbia" I stated
"Yes, is she there?"
"Speaking"
"Oh" The voice sounded surprised "I'm phoning from stairlifts united" Said the voice, or something similar, I can't remember now! She spoke again, quite slowly in a soothing tone "There's nothing to worry about!"
Nothing to worry about?!!
"Stairlifts?" I exploded "I'm only 40, can you take me off your mailing list please?"
I put down the phone.
Nothing to worry about?!! I was worried for the rest of the day! I spent it wracking my brain wondering what on earth I had purchased in the last few weeks that had led to me being a candidate for a stairlift!!
I want a chair lift with a heated butt massager.
ReplyDeleteIt's because they know you're moving up in the world.
ReplyDelete(sorry that was bad... but I couldn't resist)
i bet that with enough alcohol and drugs, a stair lift would be a blast.
ReplyDeleteLOL When I turned 30, I began getting offers to join AARP. We made lots of jokes about it.
ReplyDeleteI hate it when I get birthday greetings reminding me I'm oer 50 from firms I've never had any dealings with offering to make life easier for my ageing body and mind! :(
ReplyDeleteI needed that laugh. I tell people that my age is a number it doesn't really mean anything to me. I am only as old as I feel. Somedays I feel 100 and others like I am a kid again. But a phone call like that is like someone calling to see if you are ready to purchase a cemetary plot. I proud you hung up on them. have a great day!
ReplyDeleteHahahaah! Now that was funny! Maybe you were dawdling in the aisle where they have cranberry juice which is often a senior purchase? Have you been at the Ovaltine too?
ReplyDeleteMrs Subsiding was a witty take on how cold call sellers don't actually give a fig to whom they are speaking.
So when did you arrange the demo'? S.S would love that!
Stair lifts, great when you've had a drink or three. perhaps you were a bit hasty hanging up?
ReplyDeleteOh dear. The downward slope from now on then.
ReplyDeleteBut secretly you want a stairlift, don't you? Imagine the fun you could have. And you could send all those things that sit on the bottom of the stairs upstairs on their own.
Course then you'd need an automatic chair-tipper at the other end. But I'm sure they've already thought of that and have designed one.
Maybe you should apply to that programme on Channel 4: 10 years younger? :-p
ReplyDeleteMaybe you were with your mum when you gave your name? Maybe you bought something in beige?
I'm not really helping much, am I? x
You should worry - my inbox is filled with offers of cheap viagra, penis enhancement and cheap share deals! How do they know?
ReplyDeleteMany years ago we signed up for an unpublished telephone number. It costs 75 cents per month and is an absolute blessing. No one...and I mean no one, including my mom-in-law on vacation who tried to call because my dad-in-law had suffered a heart attack and she couldn't remember our number - can get your phone number. The phone company call us and relays emergency calls like that one. If we get one or two telemarketers PER YEAR, it's only because those are on the computer-generated ones that go down a list phone number by phone number. Don't feel bad, 'Burb...I've been silvery-haired since I was 35 and have been offered Senior discounts ever since.
ReplyDeleteI sound like a child on the phone. I love it when I answer and the caller asks to speak with one of my parents, please. So, I say, right...here's the number, don't mind the international charges, they don't hurt too badly!
ReplyDeleteMaybe only old people are senile enough to purchase green houses! :D
Hi Misskris, we don't usually get these sort of calls either.
ReplyDeleteDottrel, by the look of that bundle in your arms you certainly don't need the first two!!! ;)
No Kitty, that's no really working for me!
Oh Buggar! Liz I knew I needed one really!
Hi Brett, I never drink....except on Thursdays and Fridays and Saturdays ...oh and Sundays... then theres Monday and ocxcasionally on Tuesd.....
BS5, Yep he'd love it!
Susan, I know what you mean, I blame the kids!
Are you sure it wasn't a wind up.
ReplyDeleteHammer...sounds perfect!
ReplyDeleteHee hee Alaina:)
Minijonb, it would be fun to try but I guess by the time I get one the drugs will be purely pharmacutical!
Hey I wouldn't worry....I popped into a retirement home to drop off some paperbacks for the residents. Stood talking to the activity director and she said I would fit in perfectly around there. I am 44, it took me a minute, to figure out she meant as a volunteer rather than a resident!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThat was only one of the strange things that happened to me that day, I wrote all about it on my blog!!!
Great blog,
Gill a fellow Brit living in Canada
You can stop the "spam" on your telephone line. Think you get hold of the number via BT or somewhere. I hate it when I get double glazing calls - they ARE scary...one of these days I think I'll just throw a few Latin words at them (the few I know anyway)...that should sort it!
ReplyDeleteI feel rather left out (I have no stairs, unless you count the ones outside the front door of the flat).
ReplyDeleteOne good thing, Suburbia, at least it was on the phone and not face to face!
ReplyDeleteBlogthatmama
A stair lift would be cool! You could get one for when you're feeling lazy and can't be bothered to walk up the stairs! Bet the kids would love it!
ReplyDeleteBut, on the other hand, it's not quite your time yet, is it?
take care!
Peter
Now I know I left a comment here yesterday...knowing me, I forgot to hit publish.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, cheer up! A couple months ago I received an invitation to the new maternity wing and birthing rooms of our local hospital. Showed it to husband and we both chuckled. But we laughed even more when I found out my mother also got one! Needless to say, neither one of us have any need for this any more...
Keep using the stairs now and you won't need the lift later... you will be in good shape and able to get up and down them just fine.
ReplyDeleteReally.
Stairlifts. Sakes.
Scarlett & Viaggiatore
Ha ha ha! That was funny!
ReplyDeleteAt least she didn't ask for Mrs Stannah! x
ReplyDelete