However a family outing was not avoided altogether. Sunday dawned bright and blue, so we went out for a walk together. The walk has the added bonus of a cafe at the end, which also acts as a sweetener for the children! We haven't walked this way for a long time. It seemed strange to all be together at the weekend, it has been 4 weeks since we have been so. The day was beautiful, there was lots to be thankful for but I felt a little numb and apart from things. My head was full of things I couldn't discuss with the children, I felt an outsider in my own territory.
At the cafe the children were particularly difficult with each other. Small Sprog wanted things he couldn't have (I could identify with that one!) and sulked a bit. Husband nagged Tall Girl and she sulked too! Were they picking up on my mood, or was it just that sort of day? I longed to be somewhere else, I felt trapped and I found it hard to concentrate on the present.
By the time we arrived home again there was still quite a bit of afternoon left. How slowly the day had passed. The nit children were out on their bikes, so the children were delighted to join them. That, of course left just Husband and myself in the house together. We are strangers together, skirting about each other, marking time. I felt that I was wasting time actually, just waiting for it to pass until the weekend was over. How mad is that?
So, I pulled myself together and made cake! I remember that my mum always baked when she needed something to cheer herself up. It sort of works, well, at least it passed the time, and the house smells wonderful!
What did you do to pass the time this weekend?
When I was going through what you're going through I cleaned. And painted. And feverishly chucked out anything that needed chucking out - cupboards were turned out and clothes were taken to the charity shops. The symbolism wasn't hard to decipher.
ReplyDeleteThis weekend I make a sock monkey, cleaned the house, and watched a couple of movies.
x
when all else fails, I make macaroni cheese. That is almost the same as making macaroni cheese.
ReplyDeleteThis weekend was really quite saucy, so I couldn't possibly blog about that lol. Now I am a bit googly eyed.
I went to see my brother and sister in law. That was rather nice!
ReplyDeleteThese family outings do seem a strain. is it going to be every week?
I can relate to that...difficult times...I too baked a puff pastry tart, dauphinoise pots with baby corn, glazed carrots and roast chicken...its been deovoured!
ReplyDeletebreathe and keep that chin up girl!
The very best therapy is kneading bread dough. You can vent a lot of anger and frustration that way, plus the house smells wonderful, and you have some delicious bread for your efforts!
ReplyDeleteI sold push chairs to unsuspecting new parents... would YOU take advice off of a 22 year old student?!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your family weekend turned into just a day, and not even a whole day either:) Baking sounds like a wonderful release, especially Molly's idea of kneading bread dough--great therapy!
ReplyDeleteAs for me, I finally got something this weekend I've been wanting for a long time--a puppy! So, of course, I have been walking her a lot and cleaning up all her messes:) I'll post a picture of her in the next day or two.
There's something in the air today - yours is the third blog I've read today where the owner has been baking! :0
ReplyDeleteSorry about your Sunday. I can imagine a little how awkward it must have been. Hopefully your husband has realised, too, that there is no going back, now.
ReplyDeleteI am staying with my mother, at the moment, whilst my father is in hospital, so we've been hospital visiting for the last week or so. No time for much else really, except food shopping and eating! Hope things look up for you.
Hello! I passed the time not roasting my Sunday chicken so I will do that today.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a sunnier week ahead.
It must be hard to be in such a tense atmosphere all the time... and one where people are not/cannot address the cause of the tension as they'd like. You must ensure you get some proper R&R time otherwise you'll go mad. As for me - a good book, a choice bit of telly or even bumming around on-line all help me pass a calm hour or three.
ReplyDeleteSounds like there was way too much tension in the air for the family day to be enjoyable. Clearly a lot still to be worked through and resolved before you can properly move forward to better times.
ReplyDeleteWhat did I do at the weekend? Listened to Cara Robinson, read Songlines by Bruce Chatwin, walked round our local forest park, watched the Andrew Marr Show. And of course lots of chatting and fooling around with Jenny.
Like Kitty, when I was where you are now I picked up a paintbrush. I managed top decorate the entire house, top-to-bottom (and it's a three storey)one summer. Now the paint is gently peeling and the colours are starting to fade, and we don't often notice; if we do, we don't care. That time can come again.
ReplyDeleteOn Saturday I cleaned the oven and on Sunday we spent a day in the garden. Our first this year and it felt so good to be out there in the fresh air tidying things up. When I am feeling down I like to get out in the garden.
ReplyDeleteSuburbia - I was sans internet - You will know how traumatic that can be, and we had a run out in the car to photograph the Winter's Gibbet in the rain - How wonderful that was!
ReplyDeleteI shall have an award for you later today - Please come along and collect it?
I don't think there can be any going back now, with husband and you, I mean. Well not from the sound of your weekend, although not as stressful as you thought, still not an ideal family weekend methinks!
ReplyDeleteGlad the cake baking helped though. I walk the dog when I am stressed, on my own, it is amazing therapy, well he doesn't answer back anyway! And if he does start answering back I will check into the local loonie bin! ;0)
We went triking on the Sunday. But came home to sad news, just written about it on my blog. No one I actually "know" but someone I know via the blogging. Funny how these things shake you up, even though we have never met.
Take care,
Letty ;0) I think things are going to get better soon for you, once you can sort things out.
btw I always found when we had tense moments here between us, the kids always played up. They are probably picking up the vibes from you and husband.
Letty x A big hug from me to you!