It's a beautiful sunny day today. My children are on holiday by the sea and I am in touch with them daily. They seem to be having fun, which is good isn't it? I'm trying not to think of it as them having fun without me, and anyway, I am also enjoying my time here very much, you can't have it both ways.
It seems that they are body boarding and crabbing most days (not at the same time obviously.) But while they are away, I can't help worrying about them; are they safe in the water? Will Small Sprog overstretch his crab line and fall in? Are they completely covered in sun cream? Are they
being 'good'? Then there is the underlying, but ever present thought - are they missing me?
Do I want to be missed? My parting words to Tall Girl were, "Have a lovely time, live for the moment, don't think about what is missing, enjoy what you have". I have only recently learnt this myself, after many years of living in the past and regretting or wanting what has been. When she was on holiday with me recently she was sad because she missed her dad. Hence the conversation above. So do I want to be missed? Do I want them to feel sad? No, I don't. But do I want to be missed?
Perhaps. . . . Just a little.
This was the view from our bedroom window in Scotland last week. Beautiful isn't it?