Almost daily diary!

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Surplus to requirements!

Since having children I have always had a job that means I get all the school holidays off so that we can all be together. It was a conscious decision, after leaving my 'proper job' (pre-kids) that I would find work that fitted with their schedule. It worked well, no childcare problems when school was out, and I always enjoyed having them at home with me; we used to do loads of fun stuff together and it often involved my friends as well, which was always a bonus.

This week I have eschewed a few invites to see friends over the last few days in order to be with my (not so little) ones (time with them is all the more precious now that they spend time with their dad also). However, they - the kids - have had 'other plans'! This is the first school holiday that I have felt surplus to requirements. I suppose it was bound to happen eventually. Though not totally surplus, I have been required to aid Sociology revision, but it didn't really float my boat!

When the children were younger I used to want time to myself, and if any of you have ever had young children around, you'll know its something rare and very hard to find - a moment to yourself. Now I have more moments than I need, my job - mostly - is done. How quickly it went in the end - I didn't need to wish for a moment to myself because it was, in reality, just around the corner. Everyone who has been there before you tells you not to wish it all away but it seemed that life would go on forever in the same way, but things change and here we are...

Small Sprog is lying out on the floor on his back, still in his PJs, watching something absorbing on Youtube. He has helped himself to a massive giant spider (a revolting sweet collection that he received with delight at Christmas, and that he is still wading his way through) together with one of his sisters homemade biscuits (did I mention we made biscuits?) His curly brown hair is in need of taming and I'm not sure he has washed recently! We have a rare conversation about what day it is; "It's Wednesday tomorrow" I say and he nods. That's all he needs to know, that and when the next meal is available to him. However a few minutes later I turn around and he is on the computer "Can I use your email on here?" He says.
"What's it for?" I ask. He looks at me blankly. "Why are you wearing 2 sets of earphones?" I ask. He grins, and lifts one set off...

So there you have it - school holidays with teens; excitement- zero, fun - not much, things achieved - almost none.

What day is it??!

Friday, February 14, 2014

Happy Valentines Day!

Ah, bah humbug!

I used to like Valentines Day, or at least tolerate it. I can remember when I was first married I would get quite excited about it, though it never really met with expectations! I remember, when the 'first flush' was over, that I'd try to make a nice meal at home with candles etc. but secretly wish for more. Then what happened? Kids I guess, they took most of the effort and most of the love and by the time they were easier it was too late to rekindle? Maybe.

At work today, during a rare lunchbreak, we all sat around the table and someone asked "who has already had some roses delivered then?" We all shook our heads, none of us, not the singles, not the newly weds, not the old marrieds or the divorced - no one. Are our expectations too high? It's supposed to be a busy day for florists countrywide - so who the hell gets the roses?!

I did however send a mum from us all, she loved it. And I bought some heart chocolates and mugs to put them in ... for the children - chocolates now eaten! And I bought myself a mug too, with a heart, just because I liked it.

At work I have been mentoring a student who doesn't really have any real friends. I have been working with him on good and bad qualities that people possess and asking him to locate his own qualities. He couldn't think of anything positive about himself, not one thing - so theres a lot of work to be done. I'm not sure if he understands yet that to love others, you have to first love yourself...

So, on Valentines Day... love yourself - and you'll never be disappointed!

Happy Valentines X

Sunday, February 02, 2014


Ahhhh, the massive birthday/Christmas/partying season is now officially over, with Small Sprogs Event being the closing feature! Now it's not that I don't enjoy partying and present giving, I love it, but why does it all have to be so close together? From Tall Girls celebrations in November to Small Sprogs at the end of January, it seems like one long round of shopping, wrapping and eating; Phew!

So, what next? Well I'm going to try a short counselling course in the Spring and see how I get along with that, with a view to a diploma in the future. Maybe I'll be useless at it or maybe it will feel 'right'. I've tinkered with the idea for so many years, nothing ventured nothing gained. I am hopeful, and sometimes that's the main thing.

Oh, and you can pop over to my new blog (attached to this one) if you fancy? It's an indulgence; a photo-a-day blog. Loads of them about I know and I did it last year but via Facebook/Instagram and it morphed into something else in the end. So this time it's just for me, a photo diary for the year and not very interesting to anyone but me, but I'm there if you want to hop over...just sayin'