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Sunday, April 15, 2012

Missing

Sculpture at University of Bristol
Botanic Garden, artist unknown.
My Daughters Blog is growing at quite a speed, she's getting followers every day, girls her age mostly, which I'm pleased about and she has all that excitement (do you remember what it was like?) every time she gets a new comment.

I did a deal with the devil  Ex Husband this Easter holidays. In order to be able to have my children during the Whitsun week - all of it- I had to forgo a week of this Easter holidays. It has been fine, I adapt to the time without them surprisingly well - or I think I do - and use it to get things done, start and finish (and that really is a revelation!) small projects and see friends. It is quite satisfying to have accomplished something visible during a non working week.

I have been just over a week without them now and today when I was tidying Tall Girls room I came across something she needed for school tomorrow. I text her asking if she really needs it (they are not home until Wednesday - see what I mean about the deal? It's a long time) She texts back that she does need it and I say I'll drop it round. It feels a slight inconvenience to travel in that direction, I still drive along the well-to-do tree lined streets thinking about other times and 'what ifs'.

I pull onto the drive and she comes to the door, my beautiful Tall Girl and it's then when I realise how much I have missed her and how much I need to hug her to me like a newborn child again. Now that she is fully grown she is as beautiful to hug as she was as a baby, more so perhaps and even more precious now because she is only on loan to me and the time is nearly up, fully grown and 16 this year, she is well on the way to being mine no longer.

We hug a lot just there on the threshold of the house that used to be mine, the one I cooked and cleaned in, the one I ran single-handed for so many years.

Small Sprog appears and sticks his head up the back of Tall Girls hoody. She remonstrates, while I hug him too and whisper how much I love him. I say good bye and see you Wednesday and I'm gone.

8 comments:

Steve said...

Wednesday will be all the sweeter when it comes...

Maggie May said...

Love the statuette!

At least your two are happy staying with their dad. Sometimes my granddaughters cry and plead not to go to their mothers. I would be heartbroken if I were her and I also feel upset to think the girls get so upset too.

I think you seem to have found the perfect compromise. It pays to keep busy and the time goes quickly. You also have stinky cat for company!!!!!
Maggie X

Nuts in May

Furtheron said...

Note - please I hope you take no offence to this comment...

This just made me realise how lucky I am, and how grateful I should be I don't have this issue in my life. Our problem now is a 21 year son living 300 miles away most of the time. He is home now but will be gone back next week for the rest of this year and exams, project dissertations etc.

My daughter is 16 already and time flying by... she says she doesn't want to leave home like my son, however I think in a couple of years that thinking may well change too...

precious times

NitWit1 said...

I think you deal quite well with a situation I have not faced and have no children, just my husband and a dog. Things have not always been wonderful. But I have had to compromise a lot to hold us together. to be fair, I am sure he has too. But neither of us have compromised cherished values.

BS5 Blogger said...

Lovely TG ans SS x

Suburbia said...

Furtheron , goodness me no offence taken :-)

Looking for Blue Sky said...

This only happened to me once since my marriage ended. He tried taking all three for a couple of days and never asked again. In fact none of them will stay overnight at his now. One less thing for me to worry about: thanks for reminding me to count my blessings. Roll on tomorrow xx

Letty - A Little Girl With A Curl said...

this post made me cry........