Almost daily diary!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Here but not, if you know what I mean?

I've not been about much recently, not read any blogs or written much myself. I have missed both. Partly I have not written because some of the stuff I would normally write about I'm just fed up with thinking about. Most of that is finance related.

Last week though, I found out that I am to loose hours at work. Only 3, but when you work part-time, that's a fair bit. So, forgive me for not writing much, or visiting much. Most of my spare time spent on the computer is used either looking for jobs or filling in applications.

I am not feeling positive, as you might have gathered. I am not doing the job I'd love, but then who is? I don't know how to go about changing things, though I have managed so much change over the last year or so, yet I don't seem to have the same clarity of thought to help change my working position.

Feeling a bit sorry for myself really! Indulge me for a while?

On top of all this, I received a letter in the post from the mediator suggesting that we wait 2 more years before a financial settlement take place to allow husband to keep the house and me to get a better paid job! I am tired of it all. I can't wait another 2 years. I will have to settle for less than the children and I are entitled to or wait and wait and then what? Why does he get the best deal? Even more fed up now! Sorry.


scargosun said...

I feel that way a lot. I try really hard to enjoy the small things that make me happy when that happens but even that is hard. Bottom line is, we are all human and our feelings and emotions are not wrong. I hope you find something and happiness wise. :)

Furtheron said...

Bad times.

Either you put it in a box and wait it out or you decide you have to cut from it emotionally and therefore necessarily compromise. Tough stuff

Jobwise - you have a job so don't worry - just start looking once a week through the paper, job boards and apply if you see something you have nothing to lose.

Steve said...

Stick with it - things will get better or at least seem more positive soon. Good things are just around the corner.

nick said...

Very sorry to hear about the hours cut and the mediator's proposal. I'm not surprised you're fed up. I certainly wouldn't want to wait two years myself to resolve things, even if it does mean settling for less. Between a rock and a hard place and all that. Best of luck finding another job, I'm sure you have plenty to offer an employer.

Maggie May said...

That must seem like the last straw not only losing 3 hours of work but having to wait for another 2 years to get your divorce.
Surely better things are round the corner......
Maggie X

Nuts in May

suse said...

You dont have to do what the mediator says . My experience of mediation was utter C%43!
I rejected the mediators recomendations.. tho i did get a letter from him later apologising for his conclusions and asking me to overlook his mistakes in calculations relating to my financial can imagine my response
you and your solicitor can still forge ahead and get the best and most stable settlment for you and the children. I am in fact very surprised that the mediator made such a suggestion as it doesnt allow either of you to move on.
You will be expected to get a 'better' as in more well paid job though. It seems to be an expectation of the court. I had to leave a job I loved at a girls school as it was low paid, to earn more cash ni a less secure post, regardless of the fact that my husband earned in excess of £60,000 pa and could well afford to support his children and me come to that, who had abandoned my career to be homemaker.
I still remember what my lovely solicitor said to me one day as he was bidding me goodnight at the door of his will get through this.... and you will and come out the other side much much happier
Suse x

saz said...

BREATHE ...the key word here is you dont have to go along with it...l'm 3 months in just, and cant bear another hub hasnt even returned anything for full took me two days he has had 6 months...
i want to get off breaks you doesnt it..

over and over how many times can l break?
saz x

Wanderlust Scarlett said...


It will improve. You are just beginning to get it all figured out.

Scarlett & Viaggiatore