The weekend is fast approaching (how does that happen so quickly?) and the impending 'family day out' is playing heavy on my mind. I have asked Tall Girl what she would like to do. Go to Scotland was one idea! Just a little too far for a day trip I think. Small Sprogs comment, when I asked him what he wanted to do was "I dunno!"
The thing is, the idea of a family day out, in theory, is good, but the children have been away from home a fair bit of their spare time recently and often at the weekend they are happy to drift off to see their friends and generally chill out. It is Husband who wants the day out. I wonder where we will end up?!!
After what I thought was a massive breakthrough in communications last week, we seem to have gone back a few paces (as some of you commented that we would!). The stalemate is back with avengence and I am torn between forcing the issue and just leaving it all until someone gets tired of living like this. The trouble is I'm already tired of living like this!! I don't think it is doing the children a whole lot of good either. They are quieter and not so full of fun. There is a little dark cloud hanging over this house, you can feel it. I am not good at waiting.
15 comments:
Not acting is sometimes the hardest thing to do. I am terrible for that, always jump in, take control. Your patience will pay off, and is probably the best thing to do. Think all kids are a bit flat at the moment. End of Feb, end of half term etc.
I cannot see how Husband's wish for a day trip together en famille will go any better from what you write on here, than if you all stayed at home.
To be honest, sometimes going away from familiar things, can be a strain even on the happiest occasions, let alone when things are all up in the air like this.
I favour your thoughts, stay home and let the children relax and enjoy themselves with friends and usual stuff, after all they were away last weekend too. Perhaps just too much upheaval?
Difficult times indeed.
I hope you enter more peaceful waters soon instead of such stormy days.
If you do have to go somewhere I just hope the weather is good to you, and it is a place perhaps you all love.
Letty ;0))))))))
oh sorry, darn it, I have just realised after typing all this in, I am logged in as my dog.....I don't mind, as long as you don't mind, if you publish my comment as Marvin, no harm done! And he can be such a wise old dog sometimes!
Sorry to hear the breakthrough wasn't all it seemed. I think you should force the issue, otherwise things will just drift indefinitely. Especially if as you say the children are a bit subdued.
Sweetie, i just wish i lived next door to you and then i could come round with a bottle of wine and comforting talk (could have a fag out of the window). You're going through a tough time and i wish i could be there for you. Will be here for you "cyber-ly" instead.
Hope you get through it okay, my sweet. No, weekends are better for winding down more than a pressured day out. xxx
I think Tall Girl is onto something, I think you should go to Scotland, and I know just when, too!!
;o)
Ah, my dear friend, leave. If it can't be fixed, then walk away from it. If it can be fixed, then do everything in your power to repair the rift, but it just doesn't sound like that's where you are.
~HUGS~
Scarlett & Viaggiatore
I reckon I am with Reasons for this one.I too am impatient and have a preference for pushing, but sometimes patience does pay off. Stuff has a way of working itself out sometimes ( but there is a limit...)
Waiting for the thunder is always worse than the actual crash... unfortunately you'll face a few more stalemates before things really start moving. As for the day out - museums are always good: something to talk about around every corner of, if you don't feel like talking, lots of things to lose yourself in...
I did the days out thing with my Ex when we first split up. Good luck Sub. I think the kids will enjoy but I’m not sure if it’s good in the long term. Don’t go to Scotland though. The kids will fall asleep and that leaves a long car journey with too much talking / long silent pauses, if you get my drift.
That's difficult. I don't know whether the children will find it reassuring, if you have a family day out, or confusing. I hope that your husband isn't just trying to pretend that all of this just isn't happening. I do hope that it all goes well, anyway.
Sounds like Gabriel's halo has fallen off:)
Sounds like ending this all is not going to be easy. Some people just can't face reality; your Husband sounds like one of those. I wish I had some helpful advice for you, but I don't...I can only hope that dark cloud goes away soon.
Reasons, and Jo, thanks I really have no option at the moment than to be patient I guess.
Marvin, you are a truly wise old hound!!
Thanks Nick and Scarlett,The difficulty is money. If finances were more secure the children and I would be long gone!
Jenny, I wish you lived next door too, I know you would always cheer me up :)
Thanks for your words of experience, Worrier.
Mean mom, my thoughts exactly.
Rose, that is funny! He's in the garden now with SS, prodding the frogspawn!!!
At least he was sitting in the sink.
Hope the day out passes amicably. If it can. Maybe it will give husband a jolt and spur him into action.
I am no expert but maybe you are trying to rush things a bit. You have been thinking about your future for some time but your husband and children have not. Maybe they need a bit longer to get used to the idea.
rites of passage...ho hum..l have a few stories...I wont I you with!!
Maybe you have to live under the little black cloud for a bit longer until there is a storm that will blow this way & that. Maybe that will sort things out.
I wish I had the answer but maybe things go at a slower pace.
I think what I am trying to say is that Cheshire Wife has a point.
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