Almost daily diary!

Thursday, February 19, 2009


Yesterday evening I went to the supermarket to get all the food for the childrens holiday. It was an 'automatic pilot' job really, there is a routine to those sorts of trips! It was almost 9 pm by the time I arrived home, but much better going in the evening than to drag reluctant children around the shops during half term.

I have no idea what happened when I arrived home, only that, within minutes there were harsh words spoken with much feeling. Luckily the children were in bed and asleep. It wasn't a pleasant half an hour (if that) but it has had positive repercussions this morning.

Husband has come to his senses and decided that we can't go on living here, like this. The penny has finally dropped, and I guess it hasn't really taken all that long. So this morning he is talking divorce and settlements. I hope it is not just another phase, but he seemed coherent. It is the first positive step along the way and it will take time, and a relief that he understands there is no going back now.

It feels strange to be taking that first real step into the unknown.

PS I found this great dating site. Check it out for the perfect date!


Maggie May said...

That seems to be a step forward. I am sure that you will both get on with your lives and the children will still love both of you, even if you are going your own separate ways.
Was a bit much to expect you to do all the organizing for a holiday that you weren't even going on.
All the best.

Tim Atkinson said...

Small steps - let's hope they're in the right direction.

Anonymous said...

Very glad the penny's finally dropped, as you put it. Now hopefully you can move forward instead of going round in circles. And his acceptance should make it easier for other people to accept the situation as well.

Nicky said...

I am glad he is starting to accept it. Hopefully this will mean things will start to get sorted now.

Midlife, menopause, mistakes and random stuff... said...

I hope that things will be allright and very civil.
I will be thinking about you. I have been to this place before. It is hard, but it gets better. I promise.

Steady On
Reggie Girl

cheshire wife said...

I hope that this coming weekend will help you both of you to see things more clearly.

Anonymous said...

Yaaaaaaaaay, you go girl sugar hon!

Vodka Mom said...

First time here- but am sad for you! Money is tight here as well- hubs is out of a job. I am TRYING to be supportive, but I'd like to just Kick his ass.

XXYXX said...

It sounds like it's going well - which is to say shittily - but given that circumstances, shitty is good.

Accepting painful change is necessary, and coming to terms with loss is painful - these are both hard things and big things.

So it sounds like it's going well.

Mean Mom said...

Yes, that sounds like progress. A bit scary, in a way, but better than being in limbo. It was tough that you had to do the shopping, but at least you know that the children won't starve, while they're away!

Working Mum said...

Sounds like your husband is starting to accept the split and it is good that he wants to spend some time with his children. Yes, you will have to get used to these separate holdiays, but hopefully you won't have to shop and pack for the next one!! (He hasn't quite got the idea of separate holidays yet, has he?)

PS Try to have a nice time while they are away.

Letty - A Little Girl With A Curl said...

darn it! I could not get the link to work on the dating site..... ;0(

a message comes up to say Blogger is undergoing maintenance for 30 mins, so I will give it a go later.

Not that I am looking, just curious!!

Steps in the unknown are always frightening, although thinking about them usually more frightening before you do it!

Trust me on this one!

Letty Who Will Be Back to Check The Dating site out!

Rose said...

It sounds as though some progress is indeed being made, Suburbia. Actually, from what you have said in the past, this is a very big step for Husband to make. Stay will get through this, and life will get better.

Steve said...

Hmm. Progress in these circumstances is often two steps forward and one back but progress is undeniably progress! :-)

Kitty said...

A day at a time, and it will gradually get you to where you want and need to be.

I thought of you yesterday, encouraging me to go along with my kids' plans - my cousin tells me she has found me a perfect man and wants to fix up a blind date. Nope. No. No. No. Not playing. Too scary! :-O


Elizabeth Musgrave said...

I have been where you are now, many years ago now so it was quite painful to read about it. It is all hard, much of it is shit, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. The most important thing in my view is to hold to the knowledge that your children need both their parents and that if you can ensure that your husband continues to father them properly with or without you, they will thank you for it. And sadly you do need to be utterly committed to that, you are their parent, you are choosing to end the marriage. Sorry, don't mean to sound harsh. I was you once.

xxx said...

Great blog!
I've just arrived so won't comment on this post.

I'll be back.

Best wishes :-)

Jennysmith said...

Good, sweetie, at least he's not gonna keep plying you with "lets make it work " stuff. You poor thing, you must have been exhausted as it was! What a rotten evening.

Yes, its a strange new world but don't forget your friends here are behind you. xxxx

Brett said...

This sounds so positive. lets hope this is the start of a new begining

Dori said...

Glad to hear he's finally coming around to reality! He has a lot to think about during the week away.

Hadriana's Treasures said...

Been away, Suburbia, but will be back to catch up on it all. Maybe it's going in the right direction? Big hugs Hadriana x